Slightly Tranquilized Entry

I had to take a tranquilizer today. I try to avoid taking them because all I do is sleep. But...
I'm feeling all proud that we are paying down our back rent and the landlord decides he wants to inspect the inside of the house because we have a washer and dryer sitting in the dining room!
They are sitting there until I get parts, and my husband is home long enough to purchase a dolly and get a friend or two to move them to the laundry room. I thought the greasy little prick (landlord) understood this.
So now he is acting like we are some nutball hicks that keep appliances everywhere and secretly farm catfish in the bathtub. I can't tell you what an unsafe feeling I have. I need to feel safe in my own home, without fear that this slimy little cocksucker is going to tour my home and poo-poo my cleaning habits. From the looks of him, he has only a passing acquaintance with bathwater. How he managed to sire children with a human female, I'll never know. I don't think even a goat would have him.
Anyway, being off most of my meds, this threw me into a major panic attack and for the first time in a long time, I just don't want to be alive anymore.
I'm not actively planning suicide but I get so tired of dealing with these assholes...and there are so many of them on this planet. I mean, let's say I shot and killed two assholes per hour over the course of three months. I don't think I'd even have my county cleared of assholes at that rate.
Hubby is gone too. This makes me feel even less safe.
The temporary solution is to drink alot of soda and lose myself on the Net...until I fall asleep again from the tranquilizer.
Eventually, my normally peaceful view towards life will return...or I'll make good on my little math equation. Whatever.