Babies Again, Goddamit

The way I feel today is: I do not feel like a whole and complete woman because I do not have kids. I feel like a unvalidated husk of a woman. I feel lacking, inadequate, less than.
It seems to me that when I die, there will be nothing left of me. And before I die, my life will be considerably lonelier without any grown children and grandchildren.
I don't think these attitudes have been foisted upon me entirely by society. I think they also come from that deep primal urge to reproduce. Either way, it is fucking with my self-esteem.
No amount of "positive self talk" about "women's changing roles and values" is going to help. In short, I am unable to kid myself any longer. Not having any babies hurts! I hate the very idea!
Goddammitgoddammitgoddammitgoddammit!