Drowning

I had to take a tranquilizer last night. I woke up today at 4pm and as I lay there, trying to find the courage to get out of bed, I felt like I was drowning.
I'm drowning alone and there's no-one to reach in and help me swim to safety. I'm out of food and afraid to leave the house to go shopping. I don't want people to look at me or even know that I exist. My hair is tangled and I can't comb it. My house is a mess, as my dear husband continually tells me, and there's no energy left for me to clean it. There's no-one to reach in and help me.
I just don't want to be alive anymore but something drives me on so after I'm done writing this, I'm going to sit in front of the TV and untangle my hair and try to get up the courage to go to the store.